Join me every first Tuesday of the month for a chance to ask me your most pressing behavioral questions!

In this month’s Dr. Marcie Ask Me Anything we spoke about:

Professionals at 8:30pm EST:
•    How sensory issues and behavior issues have overlap and interconnectedness between them.
•    Why keep trying when it’s the end of school? How to maximize this magical time and a unique opportunity, since there’s no state testing and you know the kids very well.
•    How to make a referral to a professional by being compassionate with the family and front-loading positive feedback.
•    What to do with the kid who asks the same question over and over again? Use my mantra, meaning what you say and saying what you mean.

Parents at 9:00pm EST:
A three-part parent situation:

1)    My seven-year-old refuses to listen to my commands, so I repeat myself, each time getting louder and louder, until we’re angry with each other.
⁃    Answer: I hear this a lot from parents and the trick is to mean what you say and say what you mean. Stop repeating yourself and make sure you’re ready for things to happen. If not, don’t say it. Let go of the things you want him to do and only really demand/ask him to do the things he must. Everything else is a choice.
2)    After my seven-year-old and I get angry, we then have a sour relationship the rest of the day. He resents me and I resent him. It gets really difficult with our communication process and becomes a vicious cycle.
⁃    Answer: Be the adult. You need to model letting go of hard feelings and transitioning to it being okay. Find a way to get over it and go back to normal, even if your small being doesn’t yet hold that space. Actions speak louder than words, so show him how to be and act after these tough moments.
3)    He views me as the commander-in-chief mother and just doesn’t want to be with me. It makes me really sad.
⁃    Answer: I think it’s okay for you to be the commander in chief — you’re the adult and call the shots. (Tweet) He also should know that you are the most fun person ever when he is listening to you. It’s a balance but the more fun you are when he is listening, the more listening he will do. The more strict/consistent you are when he doesn’t listen the less that will happen also.

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Insight into Action!

What questions do you have about behavior of small beings in your care? Post them below and I’ll make sure to cover them during the next session on July 7th (sign up here).

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