Are You Teaching Your Kid to Lie?
Watching people move through Central Park is my favorite reality show.
The other day I was watching this dad with his two kiddos walk through the park and stop for a picnic. The small ones were about six and eight years old. They were right at that age when they’re learning to really get under each other’s skin.
I could just tell that the two siblings were gearing up for a massive fight. Sure enough, within a few minutes they starting shouting, so the dad had to break it up. He then turned to the oldest, “Why did you start this fight?”
What I saw unfold was masterful; this kid deserved a Golden Globe! The older sister started to cry and launched into a long, dramatic story about a friend at school who was giving her trouble, how her feelings were hurt, and how she felt helpless. The dad dropped the sibling fight from the conversation and started to comfort her. His daughter essentially engineered an escape with a popular tactic amongst kids: cry and dad will cave.
Having seen this situation unfold countless times in my private work with families I had serious doubts that the story was completely true. She very well may have twisted a small incident into a reason to get her father off her back.
In this case, she’s learning that altering the truth, lying (!), is a worthwhile solution to a problem and sanctioned by her parent.
I wondered: How else are we teaching our kids to lie?
Today I talk about the small ways that you may be encouraging the small beings in your life to hide from the truth.
Click below to find out how.