Raising Twins: Different Needs for Different Kids – Podcast Episode 2 Season 3
About the episode
Cassy is the mom of twins 9 year olds who are headed into 3rd grade. Rae, her son, is introverted and reserved. Rose, her daughter, is energetic and outgoing. Cassy and her husband look for ways to balance their seemingly very different children.
Go To Glitter
We always have a good time when we go places! That can be staying in a local hotel and visiting a water park or taking a cruise or traveling internationally. We love to travel as a family and spending time in new environments.
Dr. Marcie’s Must Make Moves
1. Continue to parent each child differently. Support your son to see the bigger picture. Support your daughter to see her value outside of what she is giving.
2. Ask questions to help them both see the areas they need to extend. Rather than provide scaffolding for your son, ask him questions to realize the support he is receiving and build his awareness. For your daughter help her reflect on what she needs first, before she helps others.
3. Create proactive goals. Set up ways for them each to grow in new ways, as you enter into situations rather then as a correction after the moment has passed.
Asking more questions. For my son, that will be asking ‘what do you think your sister might want?’ instead of telling him to do something. For my daughter, that will be asking her to think beyond her giving.
Here are some additional questions you can ask your kids
5 Questions to try with your kids who are like Ray:
1. Do you think anyone else would want a ___ also?
2. Who else would enjoy this?
3. Before you get started, what else/who else needs to be included?
4. How do you think this will impact _____ (your sister/friend/teacher)? Is that the impact you want to create?
5. What would make someone else smile today?
5 Questions to try with your kids who are like Rose:
1. What would you like to do?
2. Who shared with you today?
3. Before you help ____, what do you need for yourself?
4. How are you feeling?
5. What friend made you smile today? What did they do?